PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
