So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
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