A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize