You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
