I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
