But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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