her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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