also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize