The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
