doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I'm both gender and math confused
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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