How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
