i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
the day after is always just damage control
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
