So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
what day is it and did you see me today?
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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