It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
