false alarm. still invincible.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize
