When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
