you turned your livingroom into a bong?
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
