I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
