Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
