I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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