If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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