i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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