I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
i was born a porn star she said
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
