Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
