You can't special order awesome
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
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