Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
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