weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
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