She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
