i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
