you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
is that a dick in a sweater?
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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