I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Randomize
