she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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