yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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