I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
