playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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