is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
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