Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
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