Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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