so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Success! We fucked roommates!
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
