it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
they need to just BURY HIM!
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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