grandma shit on top of the toilet
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
