Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
