I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I have already put on my inside pants.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
