You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
