CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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