I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
