If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
