Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
