David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
