worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
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